My love language is food and gifts,but I like to think more along the lines of gifting an experience rather then things.
Sure, physical gifts are great, but there's so many reason to give the gift of a specific experience rather then giving physical stuff.
Why is giving an experience a great gift? Maybe, you've just started dating and it isn't the time to get an expensive gift.
Perhaps you're strapped for cash, and need something more affordable to show your partner you care for them. Whatever the case might be, you just want to connect with your partner and physical touch is a great way to do that! Or any other number of reasons. A massage is a great way to get closer to your partner, help them relax, and possibly get them in the mood.
Here are some tips to make a spa class massage happen.
- Dim the lights: Mood lighting is everything. I've written a lot about setting the mood. A good lamp with a pink bulb in it is the perfect sexy lighting! Overhead lighting is harsh and not relaxing so make sure you set the mood with a good lamp or enough candles where you can still see what you're doing!
- Trim your nails: No one wants to be scratched during a relaxing massage. So make sure your nails are trimmed and filed if you're trying to rub your partner down!
- Run a warm bath: Get your partner truly relaxed and in the mood by running them a warm bath to help relax their muscles before you even dig in. Add some Epsom salts if you're really going for maximum relaxation.
- Warm the room: Remember if you're using massage oil and there's a fan or the air conditioner on it can get chilly. So keep track of blowing air, and maybe even turn a tiny space heater on. The warmer you get the body the more the muscles can relax. Warm is good, but don't make it too hot. You don't want to be sweating!
Quiet or serene sounds only: Really maximize the experience by playing calming sounds.
Either tailor a playlist to your partner (check out this post here) or simply look on spotify for rain or forest sounds.
- Find a comfy spot: Make sure your partner is comfortable so they're not supporting their own weight or straining in any way. You want their body to be putty in your hands.
- Use pillows for comfort: Prop pillows under your partners neck or hips to align their body and get them to fully relax while you work your magic.
- Be aware of scents: While some folks will love a floral scent and some might love a sweet scent some folks are scent sensitive. So make sure to check in with your partner first about what kind of scents they like, if strong scents bother them, and maybe they'll even have a favorite product you can incorporate.
- Be prepared: Have everything you need ready to go. If you know you're running a bath for your partner you can use that time to get the room nice and warm, set up a cozy spot to massage them, get the lighting right, and make sure all your oil and massage tools are right by you.
Apply oil correctly: squirt it into your hands first.
Don't drip oil onto your partner. First of all it can make a mess! But also squirting into your hands first allow you to not only warm it up a bit, but also control how much and where it goes.
- Keep in touch: don't break contact- The best massage tip I've ever gotten was to maintain hand contact on your partner. Use slow, steady strokes that rub in the direction of the muscles.
- Slow and steady wins the race: Slow, firm and long strokes using your whole hand, or finger pads not tips, fell best. It's important to warm the muscles. Fast and hard strokes will only irritate the muscles, and your partner will be begging for you to stop and not for the fun reasons!
- Put your heart into it: Most importantly be an active participant. Your partner will know if you don't want to do it. Put the effort in and it'll be rewarded.