Creating your own spells is a great way to personalize the work your doing and tailor it exactly to your needs.
Of course, do your research on appropriate crystals, oils, etc that will help you achieve your intended goal.
It’s important to understand just what spells are. On a base level, spells are procedures. The use of a spell is meant to prepare you for going after your intent and to direct the energy that will draw your intent to you, or clear any obstacles for you to reach it.
There are a million and one ways to create a spell or ritual, but the basic ideas are the same. Mostly the creation depends on the practitioners methods, religion, philosophies, preferred tools and components, etc. but underneath there is a common framework and foundation that is what actually makes it hold up. There are essentially five essential parts to casting spells.
First cleanse your space, and any tools you intend on using during your ritual. This is the time to also really set up your altar to be able to use it without having to interrupt what you’re doing. You want to gather all tools you’re using. That means all crystals, oils, candles, etc should be readily available to you.
You don’t want to get all your energy focused and have to break your focus to grab something you forgot about. Energy flow is important to any ritual.
Take this time to set an intention. If you’re doing a ritual bath for cleansing, now is the time to do that. You can meditate in the bath and really think about your intention and goal. Your state of mind is important to this ritual, and needs to be conducive to your goal from the earliest preparation stages, through the spell and until your intent is manifest. Keep your thoughts positive. Thinking negative thoughts or letting doubt creep in just sabotages the results.
Invoke & Link Your Intent
If you are doing work with a deity, now is the time to invoke them. You can do this by simply showing them respect to their individual powers. Or even meditating or praying to them. Say your intent out loud. By saying and hearing it, you make it part of your reality and start to make a tangible connection between yourself and the intent.
Creative visualization: the more detailed you can envision your intent already manifested, the better. Symbols and imagery have a powerful effect on the subconscious. Use something that makes sense to you.
Energy in this sense comes from internal sources (i.e your emotional state, your thoughts and desires). The rest of the energy is drawn from external sources (i.e. your tools, the Elements, other participants (if any), deities, nature, etc).
Think of the world as being full of untapped energy. Everything in existence has energy, and then you can draw from one or more sources. Energy should build up slowly but surely by your chosen method for raising it. At the apex of energy you should direct the energy, by focusing on the intent.
In sex magic specifically, achieving orgasm is the release. Burning or breaking something is a great way to release energy. If you’re using an infusion or potion, you’d drink it.
Finish the spell with a final thought or motion to formally signify it’s done. This might be saying something, such as, “So mote it be!” Make sure to ground yourself at the end of your spell also. Once you’re done, visualize pouring out any last bit of excess energy into the earth, a tree or a tool.